Are you looking to land a job or a client that will help take your career to the next level; get you the experience you need to venture out on your own and help you establish your customer base?
You may be under the impression that getting the job or the client relies largely on your resume; whether that be the school you attended, the salon or barbershops you worked at or the people you have worked with. Even though these items do play a role in getting you hired, whats more important is if the employer or client finds you likeable. I know how important likeability is all to well. Before I ventured out to create my own business, I too had to go through the interview process. There were a couple of jobs that I was hired for where according to my resume I was under qualified for the position; but yet I beat out others who on paper far exceeded my qualifications. The techniques that I used then I still use everyday to help me earn a clients business.
Let me first state that this is not some gimmick or a way to trick a person into liking you; its merely and understanding of human psychology and how we make connections. While this is no guarantee you will get the job or client it sure will help in building your likability factor.
Look the person in the eye: There is the old saying that the eyes are the window to the soul. Thus the easiest and most effective way to establish a rapport with someone is to simply look them in the eye. Now I don’t mean have a staring contest with someone, simply look them in the eye. The simplest way to practice this method is with every person you meet find out the color of their eyes. Eye contact imparts a sense of intimacy to your exchanges, and leaves the receiver of your gaze feeling more positive about your interaction and connected to you. The 2nd part of this eye contact equation is to simply smile. So when the eye contact is created it further emphasizes the positive feelings about your interaction.
Be a chameleon: You may not realize it but watch your body language the next time you are with one of your closest friends. When we are connected with someone on a more personal level our body language mimics one another without us even thinking about it. If you have read my other blog posts you will know all about how the mind picks up on visual ques and then reacts to those ques before our minds can rationalize or adjust to them consciously. Thus when you first meet someone think consciously about what your body is saying and then match the subtle movements of that person. For example if you are standing with someone you just meet and they shift their weight to their right leg, mirror them and shift your weight to your right leg. You may be worried that the person will pick up on this mirroring, but they wont as long as you mirror the subtle body gestures of that person. Another example of a subtle body gesture would be how you are both sitting. If the person you are talking to is sitting slightly back in their chair then you sit back as well. If they are leaning forward then you lean forward as well. Get the point? Here is a great example of how powerful matching movements can be.
There was a study done by a group of Yale students to determine the true impact of matching subtle body gestures. Four students sat down in a busy restaurant to eat lunch; one of the students could see an older couple sitting at a table about 15 feet away with the older woman facing her. The student could see out of her peripheral vision what movements the older woman was making as she sat there. The student then began to match the older woman's movements. When the woman leaned back in her chair so did the student, when the woman rested her arms on the table so did the student and so on. After about 15mins the older woman got up and walked over to the student and then asked her, “I am sorry to bother you but I feel that I have met you some where before, and then the older woman went to introduced herself to the student.” Thus we can see the power of being the chameleon in making connections with others that we want to impress. It makes that person feel as though you have been friends for years even though you just met.
Point your heart: The 3rd and final tip is to point your heart at the person's heart that you are speaking with. By pointing your heart at the other person's heart you are suggesting and open and friendly body gesture. Thus your body is saying to the other person I am a friend and not a foe. Again our subconscious mind is constantly reacting to visual ques and making emotional decisions that will impact the outcome of your meeting. By adding this final touch you are sending that persons subconscious the message that you want to be friends and you are welcoming them in.
Its easy to master these techniques and before you know it you will be doing them with out consciously thinking about them. Start with just looking someone in the eye and smiling, do this with every person you meet. The add the chameleon technique and then finally the opening of the heart. Each technique you master you will notice how fast you start to make those important connections. Because you never get a 2nd chance at a 1st impression!
Remember 15% of your success will come from your “resume” the other 85% will come from your likeability, so become the most likable person on the planet and #StartLivingForMonday!
If you would like to discuss how you can become more likable and increase your customer retention email me at Clint@LathamJrPhotography.com for your FREE 1hr consultation.